The life of Riley: When George lit up
George Orwell once told me: "One sometimes gets the impression that the word 'socialism' draws towards it, with magnetic force, every fruit-juice drinker, nudist, sandal-wearer, sex maniac, Quaker, 'nature cure' quack, pacifist and feminist".
"Hang on George", I said, "that's a bit of an exaggeration".
But he was unstoppable. "Vegetarians with wilting beards ... shock-headed Marxists chewing polysyllables ... Labor Party backstairs crawlers and little men standing on platforms shooting out slogans." His breathing began to give out on him, so he paused for another cigarette.
George and I always had these arguments — petty little fights about the crowd he reckoned I ran with. But he was as wrong then as he would be today.
I admit that some of my best friends are vegetarians, and maybe others are inordinately keen on getting laid, but nowadays the nudists can stand on their own two bare feet. You don't have to be a socialist to go skinny-dipping any more, but to be one you have to get wet.
Let's all say it out loud to see what it feels like: I'm a wet! I'm as mad as hell, and I'm not going to take it any more!
Get riled and plunge in. That's a socialist for you.
"But what sort of lifestyle is that?", George would ask (if he was still around).
"Better than the one I had", I'd say. "Every morning I get up and what do I see? Poverty, exploitation and oppression. I turn on the news and what's there? You guessed it — poverty, exploitation and oppression. All day at work — when I've got work to go to, that is — there's more of the same. Honestly George, like you, I fear for our future.
"So some mornings I get up and flog newspapers. 'Get a paper', I proclaim. 'Get a campaign paper, a paper that takes sides — your side. Get a copy of Green Left Weekly!'"
This startled George. "And that makes you a socialist? To be a socialist you have to be a newsboy?"
"Not really — but it certainly helps. You read it. You write for it. And you can sell it so that others can get to read it and write for it and ... It's a cyclical thing. We beget one another.
"This way you can redecorate your life in shades of red and green. Wearing sandals and growing beards are optional. Selling au naturel is seldom practised because there is nowhere to keep the change.
"In a world full of cold pricklies", I continued, "and ever so brutish and nasty, it is nice to know that there is a warm fuzzy waiting for you on a street corner somewhere with a ready word to cheer you up. It's all about a caring and sharing lifestyle, George. Each edition is one big hug for humanity."
I don't think he got my meaning. He was always impatient, as much with me as with the proletariat. I expect he thought that all we disseminated was the cricket scores.
By Dave Riley