Loose cannons

August 27, 1997
Issue 

Medieval

"A big company is like a medieval court because the person in charge has unquestioned power." — Paul Birch, employed as a "corporate jester" to lighten the mood at British Airways.

Trendy

"There is no reason why women should not fly combat missions; it's the trend not to discriminate between men and women these days ..." — Sri Lankan Air Marshal Oliver Ranasinghe on air force plans to recruit women fighter pilots. Deaths in combat and inability to recruit have reduced male pilot numbers to less than 60% of requirements.

Long memories

"When we walk around the [La Trobe] valley complaining about Kennett's privatisation [of electricity], the workers say, 'Yes, but you bastards started it'." — Victorian Labor's energy spokesperson, Peter Loney.

If

"I'd probably say, sure I'd shut it down instantly to get a better hold on things." — Geoffrey Bible, head of Philip Morris, testifying as to what he would do if confronted by proof that smoking causes lung cancer. He didn't say what he would accept as proof.

Hygiene

"Nappies and governments should be changed frequently, and for the same reasons." — Seen on the internet.

Communists, probably

"They are refusing to take the coffins in advance, explaining that they want to live and not to die." — Russia's ITAR-Tass news agency, reporting on workers in a clothing factory who rejected management's offer to pay them two years of back wages in the form of coffins.

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