It pays to be mellowIt pays to be mellow
Prime Minister: Mr President, my government and I wish to congratulate you on your election victory. And what a stunning victory it was.
President: Mr Howard, you are just too kind.
Prime Minister: No. Not at all — these things need to be said. It was a vote of confidence, Mr President — in you and your government.
President: We like to think so.
Prime Minister: No doubt about it. It was a credit to the way you do business, Mr Suharto.
President: You know us: work, work, work.
Prime Minister: By the way, how is the family?
President: I try to look after them.
Prime Minister: What father wouldn't? You gotta stand by kith and kin in this world.
President: Over here, Mr Howard, when there's 200 million chasing a rupiah, you need to stand by your own.
Prime Minister: Oh that's so true. Loyalty is so important these days.
President: I demand it.
Prime Minister: And you get it.
President: You're loyal.
Prime Minister: To you? Yes I am.
President: My people are loyal.
Prime Minister: They are.
President: Except for a few.
Prime Minister: Communists.
President: Ah yes ... them — the PPP and the PRD. I tell you, John, they are a pain in the neck.
Prime Minister: If you don't mind me saying so — can I make a suggestion?
President: Please do.
Prime Minister: Well, Mr President, I find it's sometimes better to recognise the past. If folk are getting a bit restless — and with all due respect, they seem to be a touch angry in your country — a gesture sometimes can work wonders.
President: The bans stay!
Prime Minister: Of course. Demand respect always, but soften your image a little sometimes. It pays to be mellow.
President: I'm a soldier.
Prime Minister: Yes, of course, a forceful figure, a leader to his people, a man among men — but show a little heart occasionally; otherwise they start calling you names.
President: Like "butcher".
Prime Minister: Well, yes.
President: "Despot ."
Prime Minister: Names, Mr President — and they lose respect and get a bit surly. It can spread, I assure you, like a disease.
President: Then I will destroy it, kill it before any infection flares up.
Prime Minister: There you go again, Mr President. There's a time and a place for everything. No, Mr President, I ask you to cool it, throw water over hot coals.
President: I will not retire!
Prime Minister: Oh no, Mr President, no-one is asking you to. Stay on (if you must) but make a gesture of recognition. Here we call it reconciliation. It's another word for maintaining the status quo.
President: I'm all ears, Mr Prime Minister, all ears.
Prime Minister: It's simple really: just say you're sorry.
President: But I'm not sorry.
Prime Minister: Yes, but they don't know that.
By Dave Riley
Email: dhell@ozemail.com.au