Why boys are boys
Boys Will Be Boys
By Myriam Miedzian
London: Virago, 1992
Reviewed by Chris Slee
Most acts of violence are carried out by men. For example, 89% of violent crime in the United States is committed by males. Is this because men are inherently violent? Or is it because of the way they are brought up?
Myriam Miedzian argues that boys, from a very young age, are taught attitudes that predispose them to violence later in life.
Boys are encouraged to be aggressive and competitive. They are pressured to conform to a concept of masculinity that includes suppressing one's feelings, being strong and tough, not crying, not empathising with other people and being willing to fight. Boys are taught "masculine" behaviour through a variety of mechanisms, both conscious and unconscious.
Parents set an example of "appropriate" male and female behaviour. If the mother takes the main responsibility for nurturing children and the father has little day-to-day involvement in child-rearing, this sends a message to the child that caring for others is a woman's role.
Miedzian cites research showing that where a father plays an active role in caring for children, his sons are more likely to be sympathetic to others and less likely to be violent.
Children are also influenced by the behaviour models presented by the news media, films, videos, sports and music. These are all permeated by sexism and a "culture of violence".
Schools also contribute to the culture of violence — for example, through history textbooks that glorify war.
On the other hand, schools can also help to combat violence, racism, sexism and national chauvinism. Children in some US schools are taught courses in child-rearing. This encourages both boys and girls to develop empathy and nurturing.
The book has its limitations. While criticising companies that produce violent and sexist films, toys, etc, Miedzian does not see that capitalism as a system promotes violence, sexism, racism and war. While criticising traditional sex roles and child-rearing practices, she does not analyse the relationship between capitalism and the sexual division of labour within the family.
Nevertheless, the book contains a lot of information that is useful. By providing evidence that male violence is a product of the social environment, it strengthens our confidence that a different social system can markedly reduce the level of violence.